The Dark(est) Side

HalfMarathon1thumbWeek: #10

Pounds Lost: 8

Pounds to Go: 122

Oh Boy! Another runDisney racecation in the books! Over the weekend, I took on the Inaugural Star Wars Dark Side Half Marathon, and let me tell you it was the darkest half of my life! Not because I had to wake up at 1:45am to get to the start on time, and not because the theme was the villainous dark side of Star Wars, but because it was my slowest and heaviest half marathon ever!

You know, research has shown that for every pound you weigh, you put about 4 pounds of pressure on your joints, especially knees and ankles. So, doing the math, I ran this past weekend with an additional 488 pounds of pressure! That’s in excess of the pounds of pressure my frame should have, but I won’t do the entire math equation for you because even the Fat-Free Mommy has to have some modesty! With all that added pressure, of course I would be slower than desired, snails pace even, and I own it! I didn’t go into the race expecting some running angel miracle of speed despite my size. I am this heavy because of bad choices, bad choices have consequences, and instead of a time-out, my consequence was slug like slowness.

So there I was, jalking along the course, not knowing a single character, because I have never seen a Star Wars movie, I know blasphemy, but it’s the truth. Stopping for characters wasn’t going to slow me down, that’s for sure, but my lack of speed still ignited a certain level of anxiety. If you don’t meet the pace requirements, you get swept, end of story. If you fall behind the sweepers, you don’t get to cross the finish line, you typically still get a medal, but really, who wants a medal they didn’t earn? Ok, a lot of people, but I am NOT one of them. For the first time, in 24 half marathons, I was terrified of being swept. Looking over my shoulder or around the corner probably wasted more energy than it was worth, but nevertheless my head was on a swivel. Then, by mile 11 I was surrounded by people who appeared to be in pain, with defeated looks on their faces. You can do it, and Are you ok? are words I would call out as I passed. One woman in particular that I saw, had rubbed her thighs so raw with the friction of movement that she was bleeding, to her I offered my emergency bottle of Aquaphor. At that moment it dawned on me, that even though I was much slower than I wanted to be, and much much larger than I wanted to be, I still wasn’t injured or defeated. I pushed myself, but not to the point of injury or pain, and I finished ahead of the sweepers by a couple of miles. I was ok. I did it. Sure, I was sore and exhausted in the two days that followed, but nothing that a little rest couldn’t cure.

Beyond anything, this weekend got me thinking… Yes, I am on a long journey back to health, but it could be worse. A lot worse. I have the means and the knowledge I need to be my own success story, and really that is all I need. No matter what, just like in the race, if I keep pushing forward, I will reach my goal line!

 

XOXO, 

Fat-Free Mommy

Bigger Than Myself

Screen Shot 2016-03-31 at 11.46.55 AMWeek: #7

Pounds Lost: 3

Pounds to go: 127

Selfishness and vanity, two very easy elements of life. Each one of us is both to a certain degree, and that is not only ok,  it is good. There are times when we need to put ourselves before anyone else, and there is no problem in wanting to look your best! I have done this weight loss journey in the past for me, for vanity, and even before for my kiddos, but this time, I am adding another level of who or what is driving me down this path of weight loss success.

We all know I am a runDisney obsessed mama who is determined to do all of the runDisney races at Walt Disney World. They are fun, they are challenging, and contrary to what others may say, they are worth every penny. So, it is no surprise that when runDisney announced a new challenge during the Wine and Dine race weekend, I was all about it… just take my money runDisney! However, when it was time to register as an annual pass holder, I was left on the sidelines without the secured race bib which I desired. No amount of refreshing my screen or attempts through multiple mobile devices was going to change those evil words…”sold out” . Of course I still had an opportunity to register a week later through general public registration, but I didn’t want to wait. I took it as a sign that for the first time, I should run for something much bigger than myself, or my little family, I should run for a cause!

So I searched through the plethora of charities offering race entry, and I was drawn towards the one that not only struck a personal chord but one that I was already passionate about. It didn’t hurt that my favorite fitness mommy, Jillian Michaels was connected to the cause as well! This year, I will be running as a part of #TeamHealthierGeneration and representing the Alliance for a Healthier Generation in the fight against Childhood Obesity! I couldn’t dream of a better organization for me to represent. I was an obese child, I currently am an obese mother, and when it comes to my children, I will stop at nothing to give them the healthiest lives possible! Children rely on parents and schools to teach them how to be healthy, and right now, 1 in 3 children just aren’t learning the right lessons. If we don’t make a change in what foods are available in schools, how much physical activity children have access to, and the quality of at-home nutrition, then our children will be a part of a generation doomed for disease. The Fat-Free Mommy just can’t let that happen!

Clearly I’m pumped about this opportunity, but one thing just didn’t fit. How can I lead the way towards a healthier tomorrow, if I am not my healthiest self? The Fat-Free Mommy may be many things, but I am NOT a hypocrite! Could you imagine? Hello, I’m Mrs. McObesity, I don’t live by the healthy ideas I promote, but I would love it if you would… yeah, no! So I am putting my money where my mouth is, and for every pound I lose, from now to race weekend, I will donate an additional dollar to My Donor Drive . I believe in this cause, and I believe in myself, which is all I need to succeed. A healthier tomorrow is on the way, one pound and one dollar at a time!

 

XOXO, 

Fat-Free Mommy

The Hero and the Dwarf

walt-disney-quoteWeek #4

Pounds lost this week: 5.2

Overall Lost: 21.6

Pounds to go to Goal #1: 2.8

Overall Pounds to go: 99.8

My gracious, what a week it has been! It all started last Tuesday with the general public registration for the runDisney Avengers weekend in California. Now, California doesn’t have as big of a draw for me because; a) it’s across the country and traveling that far with two toddlers is just well, let’s just say it’s an adventure all in and of itself, and b) I don’t particularly like that the Disneyland races are, for the most part, on the everyday streets of the surrounding city. It just doesn’t have the same magic for me as running through purely Disney streets. Nevertheless, come registration day I was curious. Have you ever registered for a  runDisney event before? Well, if you haven’t let me tell you it is quite a rush! You know the time and the day it starts, and there you are, if you’re smart, about ten minutes prior just waiting for the registration link to go live. It finally does after refreshing your screen in a somewhat methodical manner, and within a flash you are entering your information and signing your running legs away to be a part of some of the most magical running moments imaginable. On top of that, events have been selling out within minutes lately, so you have to be on your registration A game!

So, there I was, on regular registration day for the Avengers race weekend, not the annual pass holder early registration day that I normally would pay attention to, and I noticed something a bit odd. The challenge race combo, the only one I would have registered for because I am addicted to runDisney challenges, was not selling out as fast as would be expected. I then looked to the date of the races, and as fate would have it, the races that celebrate heroes are on the anniversary of the death of my life’s biggest hero, my Dad. I put my little man down for a nap, checked on the registration again, and still no sell out. I took it as a sign that I should honor my hero by running in the race for heroes! And just like that we are heading to California not once, but twice this year! I feel good about it, because let’s face it, if I were to be at home that weekend, without the distraction of races and special parties, I would be.. Eating cake… On the couch, and just feeling sad. Now, that weekend can be a celebration, and there may be a cupcake involved, but at least I will have run 19.3 miles!

So, now, fast forward to today, and it’s early registration day for the Walt Disney World Marathon Weekend, or in the Fat-Free Mommy house, Dopey weekend! Oh the anxiety surrounding today and being online at exactly the right time. My heart was racing, I was breathing fast, and then within minutes, it’s done. I am officially going to jalk all four races of the Dopey Challenge… Again! Who am I! Seriously, who am I? Not even 3 years ago I would have never even thought I could do the Dopey Challenge, now it seems as though it will be something I do every year! Again, who am I?!? I know I still have a long journey of weight loss and training ahead, but I can’t help but be amazed at myself. Who I have become health-wise, and who I also look forward to becoming.

I know that my experience in this upcoming Dopey will be very different than my first, and not because I know what to expect, but because physically I will be a much different person. I will reach my goal before the first Dopey race day, which will mean that I will be racing 110 pounds lighter! That’s 440 less pounds of pressure on my knees, just that difference alone will make for a compete change in experience. And you know what, I can’t wait! I am so extremely excited! I won’t be the Fatty McFatGirl who can accomplish amazing fitness goals in spite of her weight. This past year, I couldn’t help but think people were looking at me, at my size, and wondering what I was doing there. Like I didn’t belong doing Dopey because I couldn’t possibly finish it, it would be so dangerous for someone my size. I felt like an outsider wanting to be a part of the cool kids fitness club. This upcoming year I just won’t have that cloud of self-conscious yuckiness. I will be the healthy fit mama who looks like she belongs among the athletes. I will feel as though people will then look at me as the fit mama who can accomplish amazing fitness goals because she has trained hard to do so. I know that in the reality of both situations, no one was really paying attention to me, but hi, I’m a self-conscious person, so in my head, everyone is a Judgy McPhearson. Either way, registration is over, I have come down from the high, and now it’s back to my journey! So, let’s go! I’ve got some major training to do!

XOXO, 

Fat-Free Mommy

The Biggest Loser’s Forgiveness

Week: #1

Pounds Lost: 0

Pounds To Go: 107

A couple weeks ago, I got to be a running princess once again, and I loved every minute and every mile of Disney’s Princess Half Marathon weekend. 22.4 total miles (5k, 10k, and a half marathon) later and I have to say that my best memory from the weekend wasn’t from any of the races, although they were absolutely wonderful, but my best memory is from a five minute breakdown of a conversation with a weight loss celebrity.   Danni Allen of The Biggest Loser fame was scheduled to be a speaker at the Fit for a Princess Expo, and I was beyond excited to see her. In season 14, she won the Biggest Loser, I watched her lose her weight, I watched her win, and I identified with her all those years ago, because she was inspired to lose weight by a traumatic health experience with her Dad. Us Fatty McDaddy’s Girls need to stick together, right? Well fast forward to a few weeks ago, and I was pumped full of weight loss energy, and ready to totally geek out and get my picture taken with a weight loss idol.

Seeing her talk was amazing, yes she was a celebrity, but she was real,  and she seemed like a friend up on that stage. She spoke of taking weight loss one day at a time, and making small changes in order to make an eventual big change, giving up the scale obsession and focusing on the fit of clothes. She was lovely, and I sat there just soaking in her weight loss positivity. Her speaking time came to end and it was time for what we had all been waiting for, time to actually meet her, ask questions, and of course take a social media postable photo. When it came to my turn, even with a line up of women behind me, I took the opportunity to do the unthinkable. After our photo, I said I had a question for her and then it happend… I completely broke down.  Even as it was happening, I was telling myself not to cry, don’t let it all out, but I was powerless. I told her how she inspired me because I too was a Daddy’s girl. I told her how after having my daughter I lost 220 pounds, felt amazing, and then put 120 of it back on to have my son. I told her through embarrassing tears how my Dad passed in November and how a since then my weight loss has stalled and gone in the way wrong direction, and how I just can’t seem to get a grip on it and turn the weight loss train around.  At that point I was ugly crying, apologizing for crying, and she did just what a friend would do… She gave me the biggest, most sincere hug. Then she gave me the advice that only she could give. You need to forgive yourself, she said, and she was absolutely right. 

I am sad, I miss my Dad, and for the most part, I can be strong, I can put on a brave face and go on with life’s progress. But then, there are other times, ironically today is very much one of those other  times, when the tears flow, the flashes of his death take over my vision, and I feel lost and alone. Typically, that will result in a binge,  and it doesn’t really matter what food I turn to, my ability to have self control is completely gone. At some point I will snap out of it, gain control, but by that point, I will have also gained a pound or five, or ten depending, which leaves me as a shell of strength, hating myself for not having it all together. It’s a cycle that I need to break, and that every week I work on breaking, but what I really need to do first is eactly what Danni said, I need to forgive myself. I need to take it one day at time, and realize that this time around, weight loss may not be as easy, but I can’t and I won’t give up.

I am so thankful for my embarrassing moment with Danni. It was a small piece of an exciting weekend that truly meant the world to me. I may not ever see her again, but I am a forever fan, and she has helped me more than she may ever know. I am still very much a work in weight loss progress, but I can do this. I will reach my goals. It will take a while, but I will be the Fat-Free Mommy who I know I can be!

XOXO,

Fat-Free Mommy



Recovery Time

Week #1
Pounds Lost: 4.8
Pounds To Go: 102.2

Typically, I am a devout practitioner of the church of Recovery Schmecovery. I take a few minutes to stretch, and rub on some essential oils, sometimes I even foam roll. I didn’t have any pain after the races. Sure, some muscles were tight, but nothing close to what others felt. I was walking fine, and back into my routine without a hiccup. However, this time, I did figure my body was deserving a bit of relaxation for a job well done. Of course during the week, it was busy life as usual with Baby Boot Camp, gymnastics, and ballet, but once Saturday arrived, it was time for some much welcomed pampering.

I know many runners who indulge in pre and post race massage, but let’s be honest, the Fat-Free Mommy just doesn’t have the time for that. Plus, I have a foam roller, which does the trick, that is when I use it, and I was in the mood to try something new. I had read about how acupuncture could help runners recover, and as fate would have it, one of the fabulous Baby Boot Camp mamas is also an acupuncturist. So, I made an appointment with mama Sara at the Thank You Mama Wellness Center, and onto her table I went.

First, she did some strategically placed cupping, followed by a little massage, and then the acupuncture needles. Nothing hurt! I know the thought of needles can make even the toughest cookie crumble, but really there wasn’t any pain at all, in fact I barely felt a thing! Once the needles were in, I received the best relaxation gift… 20 minutes of laying on a table, looking like what I’m sure came close to a porcupine, in the comfort of a warm quiet room, all by myself. The experience was delightful, and much better than any massage I have ever had. I left with an overwhelming sense of release. It was wonderful, and I’ll surely be back for more! In fact my next session is already scheduled as an immensely thoughtful Valentine’s Day gift from my wonderful husband! I was sure to thank him for his unknown thoughtfulness the minute I got home!

They say, if it’s important to you, you’ll make time, if not you’ll make excuses. I have always been able to make time for exercise, it has become an integral part of the Fat-Free Mommy lifestyle. However, making time for pampering, well let’s just say it’s been easier to make an excuse for the past few years. Well, it’s now time to let go of those excuses, and start making time!

XOXO,
Fat-Free Mommy

Doing the Impossible

One of my favorite wise men once said, “It’s kind of fun to do the impossible”. Well I don’t know if Uncle Walt ever dreamt of the runDisney fitness empire, but I’m certainly glad it exists. This past week, I had a lot of fun doing what I have thought of, countless times, as the “impossible”. Some of you may have heard of a little thing called the Dopey Challenge. If you haven’t, it’s a 4 day running challenge that includes a 5K, a 10K, a Half Marathon, and a Marathon. Yes, that’s 48.6 miles of magical run/walk intervals, 6 beautiful sparkly medals, and a title… Dopey! So, yes, I , the Fat-Free Mommy, am officially Dopey! Wait… What?!?

Not too long ago, I thought a half marathon was impossible, then it was a marathon that I thought was impossible, and now I know that not only are they both possible, but I can do them back to back, with some other runs thrown in for fun! The cherry on this unbelievable fitness cake is that I am still so far away from my fitness goals as far as weight loss and muscle gain are concerned, that I am certain that this still isn’t the best I can do. I took it easy in each race, knowing that I would double the distance with each passing day, and also knowing that mileage-wise, I would not be halfway done until mile 2 of the marathon! Each day after the race, I played in the Disney parks, because even though I am a runner, I am a mommy first, and my little royals needed some Mickey time of their own. I actually think keeping my legs going helped my recovery from day to day. Even today, the day after Dopey completion, I spent the day playing with my little royals in the most magical place on Earth, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I am a strong mommy and both parts of that title are equally important.

On the flip side, I know that if I were closer to my fitness goals, the challenge would have been easier, the runs would have been faster, and let’s be real, I would have looked a whole lot better in all of those race photos! So, as crazy as this may sound, I am using this past week as a new starting point, a rock bottom if you will. I arrive home tomorrow from this surreal runcation dreamland and I have a plan to getting back to the best version of me. Maybe it’s not really getting back though, because of what I have accomplished even with my body in the state that it’s in. Rather, it’s moving forward to a new best version of me. Maybe it will even be a version of me that I right now, think of as … impossible.

Well, look out world, the Fat-Free Mommy is energized, full of Disney running magic, and ready to reach beyond any impossible goal! Week #1, here I come!

XOXO,
Fat-Free Mommy

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Fear or Love?

castingIt’s that special time of year again, when weight-loss aficionados around the nation gather around that peacock feathered network and watch none other than, The Biggest Loser. The inspiration that I get from most seasons is amazing, although there were some that missed the inspirational high bar. Everything from the transformations, to the challenging journey, to how the trainers push, and of course the eye candy of Bob and Dolvett! I love and enjoy it all, and am always excited for the new season. So, let’s get to it!

First, I am excited that all of the contestants were former athletes in some way. This should mean, that the typical over-whining and overuse of the word can’t should be reduced to a minimum, or at least I hope so. With two new trainers to add to the mix, including the new eye candy of Jesse Pavelka, it should get interesting! One new trainer, Jennifer Widerstrom, said something that really resonated with me… It was something like, people either operate from a place of fear or a place of love. Well isn’t that the sprinkle goodness on top of a truth cupcake! Think about it. Fear can trap you. Fear can stop you from any number of experiences, and fear can keep the great adventures of love, health, and happiness at bay. Love, on the other hand, to quote a beloved movie, is an open door!

The love I have for my children has lead me to a healthier lifestyle. The love I have for being a mommy, and a positive health role model for my children, has lead me to keeping that lifestyle change. The love I have for myself has lead me to continue on a path which challenges my perceived limits and I even surprise myself with what my body is capable of achieving. Fear, on the other hand, disguised as it’s life partner named stress, has lead me down binge eating roads which keep me from my goals which were made out of love. Operating out of fear just doesn’t match the lifestyle I am so intent on living. So, here’s to living a life lead by love, may the road bumps of fear be few and far between!

XOXO,
Fat-Free Mommy

Sharing the Love… A Runcation Story

Well it’s been a few months, so it’s safe to say my weight-loss success story has been at a bit of a standstill. My training on the other hand has been consistent and I have not missed a workout. However, the saying you can’t out-run a bad diet or bodies are shaped in the kitchen, couldn’t ring more true. Let’s just say, I’ve been doing my research just to be sure. So, now that the research has yielded a conformation of such sayings, it’s definitely time to get back on track! Needless to say, I am not currently a resident of Onerderland, but I am in a subdivision near by with a very short term lease! Am I disappoint in myself, of course! I am acutely aware of how close I could be to my goal weight if I could only get my eating under control. However, even with that disappointment, I am excited about my physical training and dedication to that training. So, for now, let’s focus on the positive.

Three years ago when I started this little journaling adventure, or even for my entire Fatty McFatGirl life prior, I never would have thought that I would be the person who used a race as a purpose for a vacation! Well, the Fat-Free Mommy family just got back from our first official Runcation! We traveled all the way to that other sunny state so that I could run in the Dumbo Double Dare at Disneyland (10k Saturday + 1/2 Marathon Sunday). I wasn’t nervous about the races, I had done the distances back to back many times before, what made me the most nervous was that cross country flight. Armed with goodies from Ellimoon, I was ready, or rather my little royals were ready with beautiful distractions. Overall, flights went quite well, my prince was awake and excited, which didn’t seem to amuse the row ahead of us, but if you are going from one Disney vacation spot to another, you should probably expect to have tiny humans aboard.

Now, most would expect that I would be excited for the races, or even playing in the Disneyland parks, which of course I was, but the one event that I was most excited for was the two hours I was going to work the Raw Threads booth at the fitness expo! It is no secret that I am mildly obsessed with the beautiful creations of running fashion designs from Raw Threads! They are beyond soft, the colors are amazing, and the designs that give subtle nods to my favorite disney characters are the BEST! Clearly, I am a superfan, so when I was offered the opportunity to work their expo booth, by a very dear friend, I was sure to make it happen! It was only two hours, but sharing the love of Raw Threads with complete strangers was amazing! It really wasn’t selling workout gear, it was creating bonds with new friends over running fabulousness. Hands down, the best fitness expo experience of my life!

Now that we are home, I feel the need to refresh my focus. Hence the break from my apparent blogging silence. Over the course of the next 5 months I have a few 5ks, a couple 10ks, a 10 mile race, at least 5 half marathons, and 2 marathons ! All of the miles and Baby Boot Camp workouts that I will log are only a small piece of this training puzzle… The rest comes from the kitchen. So, here we go! Running season has started, and there is no such thing as giving up!

XOXO,
Fat-Free Mommy

Beauty Queens and Onederland

Week: #34
Pounds Lost: 69
Pounds To Go: 76

Super exciting week here in the Fat-Free Mommy house… I am finally back in Onederland, and it feels amazing! Looking down and seeing that old friend, number 1, was a more than welcomed change from Madame Scale… Happy dances all around and the happiness has yet to wear off. I still have a long way to go before my goals are met, but for some reason, just the sight of that 1 makes everything seem a little more doable, easier even, as if it is all downhill from here. Granted it is a big hill to go down, but nevertheless, I’m on it and I’m not going to alter the course of this downward excursion.

But enough about my excitement… Recently another body image/weight issue has gotten the twittersphere in quite the tizzy, and of course I feel compelled to share my opinion, not that it matters in the slightest, but the twitter response had me a tad annoyed. So what was the issue? None other than the Miss USA pageant, or more importantly the non-top 10 contestant from Indiana. If you haven’t heard about her, stop now and read this! Ok, now that we are all in the know, let’s discuss…

Let’s be honest here… This “curvier” than most beauty queen is still reportedly a size 4, weighing in at 135-137 pounds standing 5’8″ tall. Homegirl may not be twigtastic, but she is still sample size skinny and less than half the size of most American women, sad sad fact, but it’s true. Sure she has a little more meat on those bones, but she is more like a lean chicken wing than a porterhouse steak or pork chop! So is she “curvy”? I would say she’s athletic, but not curvy. I mean if someone says “curvy” I think of the entertaining Sophia Vergera, who is 5’7 and size 4-6, or the vapid Kim Kardashian who at 5’2″ has also claimed to be a size 4-6 but I think her clothes may have a tad more Lycra or spandex in them. Now those ladies, are what I would consider curvy, no rolls, not fat, but if you put them in a skin tight dress, the actual outline of their bodies would be a curved line. As for Miss Indiana, she even put on weight right before the competition, so as “normal” or “curvy” as she appears, I don’t think her story is as thrilling a it is hyped up to be.

However, I am inspired by Miss Arizona , a contestant who lost 40 pounds after giving up gluten due to celiac disease, who then aspired to become a model. She wasn’t naturally thin, or always a beauty queen, but she overcame an obstacle and changed her body in order to achieve a goal. Now, that’s an inspirational story.

Some may see these televised beauty circuses as outdated body-image-issue creating fiascos, but I happen to like them. These women are confident and poised examples of beauty, who typically set goals and achieve them. Do they look like the average American woman? Of course not! They aren’t supposed to! No one wants to see a parade of overweight women in yoga pants, there isn’t anything inspiring about that. But, seeing an example of beauty and fitness like these women, will motivate any of us, who are watching in our yoga pants from our comfy couches, to actively create healthier and more beautiful versions of our own bodies. Now, do I aspire to be a beauty queen, no, not at all, but like those beauty queens I do want to be a role model of womanhood to little girls, well just one really, and for her, I also want world peace.

XOXO,
Fat-Free Mommy

I’m Baaaack… But no really, this time it’s on!

Week: #32
Pounds Lost: 63
Pounds To Go: 82

Well hello there online fitness diary, I have missed you so! Well maybe I haven’t exactly missed you since I completely pushed you to the side for the past almost two months, but I do feel bad…does that count? Feeling bad is purely selfish of course since I have figured out that there is a direct correlation between my post frequency and weight loss. I mean in the past two months I have lost what, a whopping 5 pounds?!? For me, that’s just sad, especially because I know that I have been losing, gaining, and re-losing the same damn 10 pounds since who knows when. Of course, we have been super busy here in the Fat-Free Mommy house, but that is no excuse! So here’s a promise I have made to myself… I will post on a more consistent basis, or I will sentence myself to doing an hour straight of burpees! Who doesn’t hate burpees, right? Personally, I would rather go all Tonya Harding on my own knee caps than do an hour of burpees. So, is that a Deal? Deal! Onederland is so close I can see it on the scale if I don’t step on it all the way… So it’s on!

So what’s been happening? Well I am really good during the week since we are always on the go and in a predictable routine, but then comes the weekend. I don’t know what it is in my brain that just shuts down, but once Friday night comes, it’s as if a black hole takes the place of my stomach and the binge eating begins, and continues throughout the weekend. Then on Monday, I hate myself and start back on the right track, only to ruin it again on the weekend. Dude?!? I really need to get a grip! I can go on family outings without indulging on everything in sight, I know I can, I have done it many times before, but for whatever reason, my healthy weight-loss driven brain has been shutting down, even if I bring along prepared meals. Well folks, I can proudly say that this weekend was the first in many where the binge eating inner Fatty McFatGirl did not take over, and I am so excited! After all, I did give her a pretty good send off last weekend!

Last Friday was the 24 hour day at the Mouse’s House, and I went as a Fat-Free Mommy with other mommies and friends. No kids, no husbands, just the girls and we had so much fun! At the beginning I was good, I had packed all my food for the day, and until about 3pm I was actually on the healthy track…then an apple, wearing Maleficent clothing (apple dipped in caramel then dipped in chocolate with rice crispy treat horns also dipped in chocolate), beckoned to me. I looked, thought about walking past, but bought and ate it along with a mouse shaped cake pop. They were delightful and the great end to my healthy day. Many more indulgences crossed my lips before 6am when I drove home in Fat Girl shame. Ironically, that wasn’t the last straw. My turning point came a few days later when I read a particularly irksome comment on social media.

There is a new ride at the Mouse’s House, and it is one of the best, so much fun and I am so happy to have ridden it three times before the official opening. The comment I read was regarding the size of the seat on said ride. Personally, I thought they were normal and fine, and I still have over 80 pounds to lose before I am considered “healthy”! However, there were complaints that the seats were too small, and that seats of that size could pass in Europe or Asia, but in America where people are larger, the seats should be more accommodating. Reading this made me as red as an angered fairy. So you are so large that the seat is uncomfortable, and it is the fault of the seat? Really? Having trouble fitting in a generic theme park ride seat doesn’t inspire you in the slightest to to decrease the size of your hiney? Really?!?! Because right now, I am too grandiose to fit into my skinny jeans, but I am not placing blame on the fashionable denim, oh no, I am 100% to blame! So I am making myself smaller, and every day I look at those beautiful pants and I am inspired to keep going! I would think that if you could only snugly fit into something that was made to fit most people, that you would take a look at yourself and maybe be inspired to get to a healthier and smaller size. Now, of course there are amazonically tall people who can, at best, awkwardly squeeze into some attraction seating, but that’s not where these complaints were coming from, and for those people I do feel bad. However, to quote one of my favorite films, “You do not alter a Vera to fit you, you alter yourself to fit Vera.” Thank you Kate Hudson in Bride Wars. The same applies here, you don’t alter a ride to fit the obesity epidemic in America, you alter the obesity epidemic to fit a ride! Yes, weight loss can be a challenge, and at some points even seem impossible, but it is possible… For anyone! You just have to decide for yourself that the uncomfortability of a life change is worth far more than the comfortability of fatness. **stepping off of weight loss soapbox**

One thing I know for certain, if someone doesn’t want to lose weight and be healthy for themselves, then the weight loss is bound to fail. You may have to hit some type of rock bottom, or be irked enough by the opposition, to sincerely want it without hesitation, but either way you must do it for you. Well, I want this for me! My morning weigh in is my true mommy only time, it’s just me and Madame Scale, facing off, and from here on out, I will be on the winning side of the draw,

XOXO,
Fat-Free Mommy